PEARLS OF WISDOM: BAR ETIQUETTE VOL.I

The days of acting like a hooligan at a bar are behind us. That sort of behaviour should have died when you left varsity. If you, however, are still at varsity, then by all means misbehave but heed these words once you’ve left. You will at some stage leave behind the Terrace’s, Tiger Tiger’s and Shack’s of this world for something with a level of class which will require you to portray a level of civility. Such is life. Whilst making friends with your local barman may help you get snappy service, here are a few bar etiquette tips to digest which may get you your whiskey sooner.

1. BE A REGULAR AT MORE THAN ONE BAR

This is purely to keep things fresh. Nothing stimulates an evening more than some new faces. It also allows you to lay low should you – for whatever reason – throw name at Bar A. Throwing name does happen. The trick is to limit the amount of time it does.

2. BE PATIENT WHEN ORDERING

Answer me this: Is there a line to get a drink out of your fridge at home? No. Go there if you want a your drinks asap. Chances are the group of beauties at the end of the bar who are busy talking about you won’t be at your house either. Suck it up and wait your turn.

3. ALWAYS TIP MORE THAN YOU SHOULD

Consider tipping well at your regular spots a good investment. Sometime you have to buy off the barman slightly and the next time you step up to the bar, you’ll have his attention. Besides do you really want to lug around all that loose change in your wallet?

4. DON’T ASK FOR A ‘HEAVY HAND’

This is essentially asking the barman to give you something for free. Barman can get fired for being short on booze and you wouldn’t want your newly acquired barman-buddy to get the boot, would you? He’ll hook you up at some stage.

5. NEVER TIP ON A FREE ROUND

Be courteous and thank the barman then tip big on the next round. It’s a respect thing.

6. DON’T WHISTLE, SNAP YOUR FINGERS OR WAVE YOUR MONEY

Jeez man have some respect for yourself and the barman. Unless you want people to think you work at Ogilvy or something, don’t fucking do this. Respect is given and earned on an even keel.

The following two tips have nothing to do with getting a drink but more with how you’re perceived at the bar.

7. IF YOU’RE TRYING TO PICK UP GIRLS DON’T DRINK BEER

Firstly, this nectar goes down way too sweetly and will have you heading to the bathroom on a regular basis. This will kill your game in no time. Secondly a beer-drunk can become a loud and obnoxious drunk. This too will kill said game.

8. NEVER REMOVE YOUR SUIT JACKET

Have you ever seen a drunk in a suit and tie? Remove the jacket and destroy the illusion. Simple.

There you have a couple Bar etiquette tips for you to ponder. They seem pretty straight forward because they are. Yet you see so many guys acting like right douche-bags at the bar these days. Don’t be that guy.

You stay classy,

NR

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One thought on “PEARLS OF WISDOM: BAR ETIQUETTE VOL.I

  1. Pingback: PEARLS OF WISDOM: BAR ETIQUETTE VOL.II | The Noblest Rogue

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